Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about love.
Is there only one person out there? What is love even? I think I’ve felt it.. but was that really it? Is there only one kind of love? Are there wrong kinds of love? Can you only ever love one person? I mean to fall truly, madly, deeply in love? How important is it to be similar? Opposites attract right? What are the pros and cons? How long is it supposed to take to move on? How soon is too soon? What am I afraid of? What do i want? What do I need? What is required for me to love? Is love something that gradually emerges? Is it something you teach yourself to do? Is it something you know instantaneously? Or pretty close to ? Is it something that happens on a subconscious level? Is it the wrong time for someone new? This was a good step, right? Is this just fear? Why push away what could be really good for me, what was missing from the last relationship?
Each person that comes into my life, and each opportunity presented to me to love teaches me more things than I could put into words. I believe that I am a person made up of love, a summation of all the love I have ever given and received. There is not a time that I have ever loved and regretted it. There has never been a time that I have tried to love and regretted it.
I use the word ‘love’ very freely, it’s something that I say all the time. ‘I love your shoes.’ ‘I love what I’m learning at the university.’ ‘I love this book.’ ‘I love this tea.’ ‘I love that you do this’ ‘I love that you love that too.’ ‘You’re such a great friend, I love you.’ I surround myself with the things that I love. But I believe that a being in love with someone is an entirely different thing, a whole new anomaly.
If it’s not there, it’s not there.